ARGH!!!!!

FEB!!!! so fast we are into the 2nd month of the new year, however, it just doesnt feel that time is ticking pass every min and every sec. The weather has been driving me nuts for all i can see, it is hot and humid and sweaty =p eeeeeee, and it is giving me the worst headaches i ever have. It just really makes me in a really short tempered mood.

chucky has gone back to work this morning, wont see him for like 3 and the half weeks coz i will be in sg taking the IELTS english test. After that test then i will be able to actually start working without having to worry abt the week break i need to tell at all interviews.

Do i seriously look like a bum or something? i know i mite be lazy and get around to things slowler then normal now that i am UNEMLOYED!! but that doesnt mean i am a bum and i am just leeching off jeral for everything. Do you think it feels right to be getting money off her, while she handles everything, she wants to handled everything, but still that does not mean she is the boss of me. They think that i am jsut lazying around everyday, well it has only been like a 1 week or so and im just spending time with chucky for all that time that i had sacrisfy, just give me a break , i know i cant compare to jearl and everything she will always have the worst experince in everything , but afterall i am human too, and i too get distracted , ifthey can honestly tell me none of them has gotten distracted and stuff they can just prove to me and rub it in my face, but if they cant DUN FUCKING MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SHIT!!!!

it is not like i am not feeling shitty already. And worst of all i dun know that face that i get from her when she is in a bitchy mood or something, if she carrying all the load at the moment and all but that doesnt not mean she has the right to give me the attitude too, once in a while fair enough after all she needs to let it out, but now that dan is back at least she got someone to go towards to. Even so i dun need to be givening the feeling that i am the most useless person in the world.... FUCK OFF!!!!!!

Ok i mite not be the best person at preparing stuff too but she doesnt need to make it seem like everything i do it just so bad, i am not saving and blah blah blah, just because she wants things to go her way. and ppl mite call her boss, but still she needs to know that she aint really the boss in the end.


cmon i dun think either one of us all deserve watever is happening right now. Are we being punished for something that we might have done, or is this just the way our life is gonna turn out to be. I find it really sad things has to be the way they are now. Everytime im angry, as long as he comes over i feel ike everything is gonna be okay just because he is there.. OH MY GOD!!!! im becoming a mush...not good.. =p

i just hope that the opportunity will appear soon , and that things will start to get back on track.


my head is killing me now!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!